Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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