I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
