When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
