that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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