Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
