This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I wish i was in the wii world.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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