Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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