So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Never underestimate the power of titties
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
