I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
