I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
