I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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