roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize
