so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
