Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
