my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
