even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You have to summon your inner elephant
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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