i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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