Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
