Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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