oh god the rape fog is back!
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
