yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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