I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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