Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize