Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
