Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
