You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize