I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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