I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
