Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
It was confusing and full of hummus
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
