Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
