we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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