Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
