I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
