okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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