wat bout pragnant strippers??
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
