I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
