do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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