Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
