I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize