HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
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