dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
