i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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