Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Randomize
