I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
