since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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