Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
