he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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