I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize