doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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