I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
